After seeing you and hearing your heart beat, I can finally say that you feel real to me! Before that, I knew in my head that I was carrying you because the tests said I was and because I was feeling all the early symptoms, but in my heart I just didn't want to admit it. Because I was so afraid something would go wrong and I would have to deal with loss if I admitted there was something to lose. Your daddy was different. You were real to him right away. He was sure nothing would happen to you and that we would both be healthy and happy for the entire pregnancy and beyond. As we sat in the office and watched you move around, I couldn't stop the tears. Not sad tears, of course. Happy ones! Your daddy was so proud standing beside me, holding my hand and looking at you. He was so excited, he even peeked around to see the screen while the tech made measurements and snapped pictures! But the greatest thing in the world was hearing and seeing your heart beat. It was a little flicker and a tap-tap-tap, like someone tapping a pencil on a desk, but faster than someone could really tap (170 beats per minute!)
It was an experience I will never forget!
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