Saturday, March 25, 2006

Life in the extremely slow lane

It is soooo hard to get around when you have only one working leg. The crutches are impossible and even using a wheelchair is inconvenient and miserable. I went to Wal-Mart today with my parents and was completely exhausted when it was over. On the bright side, I bought several great new CDs.

My leg hurts worse today than it has since the day I hurt it. It feels like it's on fire or something. I'm not sure if that means it's healing or if I've somehow damaged it further. I really hope it's the first one. I've been so careful not to hurt it more. Of course, Hannah sat on it this afternoon by accident. Ouch. Seriously, the thing I want to do more than anything in the world is to go to sleep and not wake up until my ankle is healed and I can walk again. But I'd probably wake up to no job if I did that. And that would be bad. So I continue on with my life, doing things very, very slowly.

I'm going to close with the lyrics to a song from one of my new CDs. It's called "Scream" and it's by ZOEgirl. What an awesome group. And this is an awesome song.

Does anybody know how I feel?
Sometimes I'm numb, sometimes I'm overcome
Does anybody care what's going on?
Do I have to wear my scars like a badge on my arm
For you to see me, I need release

Do I have to scream for you to hear me?
Do I have to bleed for you to see me?
‘Cause I grieve, you're not listening to me
Do I need to scream?

Has anybody seen what's been done?
Where was my defense? No one heard my protest
The eyes of God were watching me
It's time to make my peace, let it go and be released
So I can breathe again
I'm on my knees

Do I have to scream for you to hear me?
Do I have to bleed for you to see me?
‘Cause I grieve, you're not listening to me
Do I have to scream?

I've been marked, set apart
But I'm cut so deep and afraid of the dark
One drop of blood from the hole in Your hand
Is enough to heal me and make me stand
‘Cause I'm clean, He is listening to me

I don't have to scream for Him to hear me
Don't have to bleed for Him to see me
‘Cause I'm clean, He is listening to me
I don't have to scream
I don't have to bleed
‘Cause I'm clean, He is listening
And I don't have to scream

3 comments:

  1. Turn every frustrated moment into a quick prayer for someone permanently disabled. I think those instances have power.

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  2. That is an incredibly awesome idea.

    I will start doing that right away and will continue even after my ankle heals. I can't imagine how it must be for someone who doesn't have the option of getting up and walking after 6 weeks in a cast. I should stop complaining and just pray for them. You have opened my eyes to just what's important. Thank you for that.

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  3. Best wishes that you heal up soon. The constant discomfort is more exhausting than the actually speed (or lack thereof) of the motion. Just be kind to yourself.

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